The ex-pats family lifestyle in Nanning. by Graham

An interesting topic was raised on the Nanning and China Info Forum recently:

Why do some men stay in Nanning and not bring their loved ones to the UK?

It is true that most of the ladies you meet via the internet or dating agencies will have already decided that they wish to leave China and settle abroad. They have seen American and English movies and have dreams of living in the wealthy western countries. They don't know the reality of English life anymore than we know the culture of their society. And yet they are willing to risk everything and leave their native land. But a few of the ladies are not prepared to do this. They have strong family ties and commitments, or good jobs, or love their life here, or perhaps they are just not the adventurous type. Whatever the reason, they choose to remain in Nanning. Luckily some men want to leave the UK and live in China. This article is aimed at those men considering settling here and having an ex-pat lifestyle.

Becoming an ex-pat is easy, you just leave the UK with permanent intent to live in another country and the next day you are regarded as an ex-pat by the UK authorities, although HMRC have a different qualifying period for taxation purposes. You do not forfeit the right of return to the UK and you do not need to take citizenship of the other country. It will be necessary to have the correct visa for entry into China . Only the UK gives cash hand-outs to penniless immigrants so don't arrive without the means of supporting yourself in your newly chosen lifestyle.

If you meet a divorced lady in China aged 30 upwards, it will be highly probable that she will already have one child from the previous marriage. So when you marry you might immediately become responsible for a small family. It is written into the Chinese marriage law that children shall respect the matrimonial rights of their parents and shall not interfere with the digamy and post-digamous life of their parents. [Digamy: A second marriage after the death or divorce of a previous spouse.] http://www.helplinelaw.com/law/china/marriage/mlaw.php#3

We are a typical respectable family in China. There are three of us: me, my Chinese wife and her daughter. I do not work and my wife joined me in retirement and became a full time housewife. My step daughter is training to be a nurse at Guangxi Medical University and a local teaching hospital so we decided that we should live near to her college. Normally she will stay at college during the week and with us at weekends, but she is free to return home whenever she is able and we usually see her at least one afternoon each week. It was easy to build a good relationship with her as her English is excellent and in the early days of our relationship her mother needed help with translation. I can honestly say she has never been any trouble to us and I am very proud of her.

I purchased an apartment in Nanning in the joint names of my wife and me. A westerner can purchase in his sole name, but it seemed to me that it is fair to have a matrimonial home that provides future security for all members of my family. The Chinese take great pride in owning their home rather than leasing a place. Apartments are cheap compared with UK housing prices, so it is easy to afford a nice place for a reasonable sum. It is often possible to finance your lifestyle in China just by selling your UK property.

It takes time to lose the Western materialistic society ideas. In the UK I had a big house with 5 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms, 2 new cars, 5 TVs etc, and there were just two of us in our household. Now we have 2 TVs (one too many!), two bicycles and an apartment which is adequate for our needs without being OTT. Nowadays if I need something I will buy it, rather than buying something in case I might need it in the future.

I am likely to remain on one year class L multi-entry visas for at least 5 years, and will probably do so indefinitely. But this is OK as I do not need to leave the country periodically, but can do so whenever I want. I accept that I am an alien and do not have all the rights of a Chinese citizen. Why should I have the same rights as them? Mostly I am treated as an honoured guest and I respect the people and their culture and laws.

I sometimes tease my wife about the Chinglish language they use in official places, but it is good natured fun. Here is an example from a government document: Nanning, capital city of Guangxi, enjoys the fame of China's ever green city. She shouts ictus in the earth and sky.

New Apartments in Nanning 2009

It is hardly surprising that we have signs in Chinglish considering the quality of the advisors. Many of the ex-pats work as ESL teachers or English advisors, these being two of the few jobs they can take. There are those who are excellent and must cringe at the standards of some of their colleagues. Luckily, the Chinese schools and government departments are blissfully ignorant and are happy just to have a western face on their staff.

It is great to be able to travel in China with my family, and we have seen many places together. When we met, neither my wife nor daughter had seen the sea, travelled by air or gone more than 200 miles from Liuzhou. Holidays abroad are a new experience for them. They had their first one when we went to Thailand at Chinese New Year and they loved it. The opportunity for them to travel was very limited before, and it is just one of the many benefits of being part of a multi-cultural family. Other benefits that arise are that their financial status and standard of living are usually improved, and they become more independent.

A mention should be made of family obligations. Children look after their elderly parents. It is very common to see three generations living together. If you live in China your wife will not relinquish this duty. It may be that your in-laws are independent or you may need to help them financially to remain in their own home. I made a simple arrangement with my wife: I pay her a fixed monthly allowance and from this she must take care of any family commitments. This got me off the hook at no extra cost!

One more thing that is important to an ex-pat is health care. The facilities available are state-of-the-art and open to everyone, but foreigners must pay for all of their treatment. I don't have health insurance cover. If I need treatment I will pay. But aren't I lucky to have a nurse for my daughter? Please remember: it is not free in the UK either; the government makes you pay via prescription charges, NHI contributions, income tax etc.

The other thing is food. You can obtain most western food but some will be a bit more expensive than the UK because it is an imported speciality and not widely available. Cheeses, cereals, stock cubes, custard powder, good bread, Yorkshire puddings, are difficult to find. Potatoes and all the other vegetables you see in England , along with many tropical fruits and exotic local vegetables, are abundant and cheap at the local market. You soon adapt to a more varied Chinglish menu.

Opening a local multiple currency bank account is straight-forward and you can transfer money from your UK or offshore bank accounts to cover your living expenses. ATMs are widely available and usually accept the major international credit and debit cards. There are limitations to the funds you can transfer in any rolling 12 months period and this has been reduced recently to 50000USD or equivalent. My bank told me this was introduced to stop property speculation by foreigners.

How do we fill our spare time? What spare time? I don't know how I managed to find time to work for a living! Isn't that what all retirees say? And family life occupies your time wherever you are. Dining out with friends happens a lot, it is very affordable. Drinking tea or beer, playing snooker or pool, swimming, cinema, travelling, reading, meeting other foreigners at the local 'English corners', meeting Chinese friends - just the usual things that you would do in England.

All in all, it is almost as easy to live in China as any other place and a lot more enjoyable and safer than the UK . The People's Republic of China is a modern country with excellent infrastructure and great friendly people. So don't fear stepping into the unknown to start a new life as an ex-pat with a multi-cultural family.